Thursday, October 30, 2008


It really takes so little to make Love happy. She was so excited to be at Panda, more excited to be sitting in a big chair outside and the most excited about getting to use a real fork...with pointy prongs. Seeing the joy in her eyes over things that are so simple was too fun.

Something our oldest daughter said the other day has me thinking a lot. She said, in reference to Love...."It must stink to be her." Caught off guard and a little short I asked, "Oh, and why is that?" She then said something so simple and so true but yet the thought had never even entered my Mommy brain. She said, "Every time she gets somewhere someone can come and just pick her up and move her. Anytime she has something she wants someone can just come and take it from her. She is just too little to do anything about it." Then the whole "terrible twos/threes" (although I have yet to really experience them with any of our kids) became crystal clear. I know, I know...probably I have read it somewhere when my two oldest were past this age. Why it never dawned on me I will never know.

It brings me to this....sometimes when I think I have it all under control and am on my way to wherever I am headed...well, I've been picked up and moved too or forced to sit still when I didn't want to. For instance, when we were living in our last home, after one year of being out there on 40+ acres with a husband who provided well but was gone ALOT working to give us this great life, I wanted to move back to our hometown. I mean real bad. And it was by an act of God...lightning, that we stayed. And had we not, had we moved on my time frame, well, our first adoption would have probably not occurred. I'd probably moved back and started back to work or at least part time and not had those days alone to bring the yearning for another baby. And all that fell in place behind it, including Love. I can honestly say my life has the joy it does being the wife I am to Big Daddy and the mom I am to my kids...I have been richly blessed....we have been so blessed. Or, if I have my eye on something...material or not...I have had it plucked from my hand too. And although it doesn't necessarily make me happy at the time it is always for my own good. I have heard so many non believers use these types of circumstances to back up their non"If being a christian means having to move to Africa to be a missionary or giving up my thanks" Big Daddy and I were just talking about this yesterday, the people in our lives who have the most joy, who have the closest relationship with Christ are those very people...the ones who lean on Him for, shelter, clothing, love, life...everything. I think it is because although they have very little to offer by the world's standards or to lose by those same standards they know they have so much more to gain and are more aware of it without the things or places to distract them. When those of us who do make the bills and live in houses with heat and A/C and have food on the table...well, we've got it under control, or we can sometimes think we do...and we really rob ourselves of the purest joy....the joy of the Lord. Well, I am kind of getting off subject here. Back to the terrible twos/threes...I wonder if we might be a little like that with the way God sometimes picks us up or makes us sit still or takes something or someone away....I don't know about you but I have been known to throw a fit or know, "Why me God? Why NOT me God?" pity party or "Do you even hear me? Don't you know how much more I could do for you over there? or there? But, just not here." So I'd like to refocus myself, instead of throwing a tantrum or pouting, I'd like to find the joy in the Lord always. Which I try to do...but I won't lie...I am as imperfect as they come. And always...well, that is a strong word. But,

This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it. Psalm 118:24

He blessed us with such a glorious day, started with a crisp chill, warmed with beautiful sunshine and pleasant breeze and the colors are starting to change here now, and they are absolutely breathtaking! Shame on me for not truly appreciating it more often. Thank you Lord for this truly beautiful day, thanks for protecting me from myself. Thank you Lord that your ways are not my own.

“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,” says the Lord. “And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine. For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts. Isaiah 55:8-9

No comments: