Happy 4th Forever Family Day Hope!!!

June 14, 2009 (posted 6/13)

Four years ago today we met the most beautiful little girl...Hope. She was quiet, easy going and gorgeous. She had a thick head of gorgeous black hair, a robust little figure and porcelain skin.

This day was a day we had waited for...to finally hold our daughter.There was no greater feeling than to actually be able to hold this little baby of ours...love on her...get to know her...all this time she had only been in our hearts and now, now, she was finally in our arms :)
The first year home flew by...she changed in so many ways. From not being able to sit up or crawl to running, skipping and hopping. From no teeth to an entire mouth full of 'em. She was a bundle of energy just waiting to be nurtured and allowed to bloom. And bloom she did...bigger and brighter than we could have hoped for.
The second year went even faster. She continued to grow and learn. It became very obvious she was very bright and learning came easy to her. You tell her something or she hears it once and it is pretty much memory. At almost 3 she knew and could tell you about 30 nursery rhymes, she could sing countless songs. She donated her hair to Locks of Love (second donation coming soon) after these photos. She actually understood as well as a 3 year old can what she was doing and why.

Her 3rd year home she became a big sister....an amazing big sister at that. Life was different now, she was no longer the baby. But, she didn't care...her role as big sister was much more important to her. She still tries to take care of her to this day. She is very protective of her and loves her more than words could ever say. She began pre-K this year as well. She started Awana's and began going to Sunday school instead of big church with us. She truly began to spread her wings...and she found out she likes the freedom.

Her are some recent photos of her.

Her 4th year home will hold lots of firsts. She begins Kindergarten in August. She has 4 loose teeth and she may try dance or gymnastics.

So much has changed in the 4 years since we met. She has already moved into 5 new homes. Did great with every move and actually talks about what she misses from the past few homes. Thankfully, we are putting roots down where we are (we hope).

I still can't believe it has already been 4 years since we held Hope for the very first time. That feeling of butterflies, anticipation, overwhelming love and a tad of nervousness - it still rushes back to me when I think of sitting in that room waiting for our daughter (the last one brought in) to enter the room. Cold Chills to this day!

I knew we loved her deeply, I knew we wanted her to be home with us.

What I didn't know was how much she would change us. She has grown us. She has a wonderful spirit of adventure. She quite possibly could be my very first tomboy. She loves Spiderman more than any princess or doll. She likes boy toys, boy cartoons, and wishes she could go to the bathroom standing up. I have let go...I would have fought it with my older daughter but I have let go. It is just what she likes and besides..."girl stuff is boring". How can you argue with that...not a lot of high energy adventure in a tea party or dress up (unless it is a cowboy, pirate, sheriff or superhero)?

This child of ours...I wouldn't change a thing about her. She has a great big heart. She is just beautiful both inside and outside. She is full energy. She is never boring and therefore she is never bored. She loves Jesus and she loves her family. She is creative, she is a deep thinker. She is spunky and she is free spirited.

She will never fit inside the box, nor would I ever want her to.

My sweetest Hope -

My heart smiles so big because of you.

I love you more than all the stars in the sky!!

The Power of...

CLEAN!!!!

Just had to share my two most favorite products...when I used the action scrubber for the first time...I think the clouds parted and the sun made a brief appearance - y'all it is for real - cleans like no body's business. And the shower - well, she's been neglected ever since I ran out of the shower spray and she cleans two men at least once a day. It removed all the grime off the floor and stripped the hard water film off the door in about 2 minutes - no kidding. I got so excited I pulled the pad off and scrubbed the base boards (which were totally covered in hairspray - 4 girls, 4 heads of hair, the damage is going to continue) Anyway, if you haven't tried it and your into cleaning as much as I am - well, you should. It was about as rewarding as mopping a muddy floor or vacuuming up crunched up Cheetos out of the carpet...immediate gratification :)

These jewels here clean everything...the mess that happens when pasta boils over on your cook top that takes forever to hand scrub comes off so easily, your walls look cleaner, your sink shines brighter, your coffee pot looks newer, and your daughter's leather tennis shoes will be whiter....so many uses...so little time. I am so spoiled.

I'd give up my diet DP to replenish either one of them. I started to say toothpaste - but y'all know me too well ;0)

Now, off to the next bathroom - the joys of being a domestic engineer. :0)

Da Pool...

We were invited over to my sil and bil house to swim and enjoy some hamburgers...which were totally good. The kids miss having a pool - it is one of the things we have missed as a family as far as the convenience of having it right in the backyard. But, we have the next best thing...an open invitation (which may later be retracted) to Uncle Kev and Aunt JuJu's house...SCORE! The pool was far too cold for me but everyone else seem to really enjoy it. In fact, Love was the last one out! She had a ball. She was perfectly content off on her own just kickin' back and floatin'. Hope wants to swim so bad she can taste it. And Faith was the diving board catching queen...she caught the little girls who were willing to jump off the diving board. She was a trooper. And Hunter, well, he did best at being an instigator...enough said there. The whole family was in the pool at one time - which is a rarity but fun. Here are the pics from yesterday...which is all you really wanted anyway.

A Little Friendly Competition....

Well, this past Tuesday night we went to a semi-local eatery for a radio station competition our nephew had entered. Like I have told you before he is a country music singer, trying to make it. He ended up doing really well and won the competition and he gets to open for some semi big name country singer in a big town this Wednesday.

He kept telling us his biggest competition was a best friend's from high school brother. He was good but fortunately for Matt he totally didn't hold a candle to him this night. It was an all acoustic competition so he and his guitarist took the show. It was fun to watch him. You could see him getting more nervous as his time wore closer. But, once up there...he sounded like a real pro.

The little girls had a ball...they apparently like to dance to country music...who knew? They enjoyed the live music and the people. Matt had a very nice group of...groupies I suppose. He had quite a bit of family, friends, coworkers and neighbors. He can bring a crowd.

Well, here are some photos...good luck Wednesday Matt...and that is with both performances ;)

Hope and Big Daddy enjoying the show
The dancing cuties

Aunt Jan managed to get these two to not only pose close to one another but actually smile while doing it...she has some special talent folks.

Miss Heather and Love

Perhaps some last bits of encouragement from his dad

Making his way to the stage

Singing his two original songs The family

I was disappointed in my photos...I couldn't get the light right...either too bright or too dark or too much movement. It was pretty crowded and not quite the family atmosphere I had hoped for. So, I didn't push it too much and pretty much shot on either side without getting all up in some stranger's space. Jan had taken some photos of her own and she was kind enough to share them with me:0) It was a big boost of encouragement for our nephew...and so much fun to hoot and holler for him when he won!

On a side note...his Momma (Aunt Jan) is having surgery tomorrow on her neck/back. I know she is nervous and surgery is never fun and she could really use your prayers...if you'd lift her up I know we would all appreciate your support so much.

Aunt Jan...if your reading before the hospital...we want you to know we all love you so much and are praying hard for you...hang in there girl...you CAN do this! You know The Great Physician yourself and from everything I know...He is the best doctor in the world.....(((Big Hugs))) from the Harris family :0)

Treatment #5...

Our sweet little Love had her 5th laser treatment yesterday. I always have the worst feeling about the treatments because they put her to sleep to do them. Granted she is not kept asleep long but when they take her lifeless from me and I have to wait to see her for over an hour...well, it just doesn't sit well with a Momma. Here she is all marked and ready to go...except at this point she still doesn't know what exactly is going on.

Hooked up with her very own dvd player with Dora...now that is cool. She was loving it here :)

A little while later I take her into the "prep" room and she is given some sedation to make her separation easier and she always knows what happens in this room. This is where she starts getting really clingy and whiny. She now remembers what is up...or at least I think she does. She doesn't even want anything to do with the nurse in this room. She is friendly and all smiles for the rest of them.Here she is trying to come out of it. She has a bit of a hard time. She ends up getting sick right as we are going to be released so she gets some anti-nausea medication in her IV and we wait for her to sleep it off another hour or so. She wakes up in an entirely different mood. She seems like my girl this time.

She must tolerate some liquid in the form of a Popsicle, diluted juice or Gatorade before being discharged.

We had a really good visit with her pediatric dermatologist. We had told him we did not see the big improvement we had seen in the past 4 visits. He had made a comment that that wasn't good. I suppose he was thinking we had gotten as far as we could with her port wine stain.

When he came out to talk to us after the surgery he was all smiles. He seems fairly confident this will be her last treatment on her neck. Which is great. That skin is so thin and sensitive I can't imagine how she tolerates it all so well. He said we have a lot of room to grow in the area across her check and that he was going to start hitting it harder. Last treatment he had bumped in down to 12.5 joules because she blistered the time before at 13. This time he went back to 13 joules and he can switch tools and end up at 20 joules until all options are exhausted. Last time he only used 171 pulses and this time he went crazy and gave her 319. It doesn't look much different to me post-op. He seemed really good about how things went. They used a breathing tube this time and they haven't in the past (I don't think). So he said he was able to really access all the areas very well and he felt more comfortable working longer and did not feel rushed. He always stresses how great it is that we are treating this now. That he has had patients that wait and begin at 10, 12 and 13 and it is too late, he can not get any lightening or decreased thickening. He always makes us feel secure in our choice for Love.

So, she has been like an everyday ordinary child. No whining, no complaining, no problems - I still have no idea how she manages to be so good when it is supposed to feel so bad. The nurse we had in recovery said she has had this done before and it hurts worse than 200 shots. She said it is one of the most painful things to have done...both while doing it and the healing. Goes to show how incredible our little Love is. I like to think the Lord is just giving her what she needs to get through it. She seems to have some super human pain toleration when it comes to this...I choose to believe she is in close contact with The True Healer :)

It always brings me to tears to pray for Love the morning of her surgery and then right before they take her from me. There is something about letting your child walk into a situation you know is painful and uncomfortable. Knowing that your choice has placed her there. I have been struggling a little with whether or not to continue the treatments. After our talk with the Dr. yesterday I am confident he holds her best interest at heart. He has seen the complications first hand with port wine stains that are left untreated. He is also honest enough to tell us...enough is enough and this is the best result we will get. He seemed to hold great hope that the future treatments would be more effective.

Our Love is just such a beautiful little one. I mean truly this daughter of ours has more joy in her pinkie finger than many of us have in our entire body. Her smile will light the room and her laugh is contagious. She is just a doll. And her port wine stain...well, it is exactly how the Lord brought her into our hearts. As selfish as it seems, I sometimes think I am trying to eliminate the very thing that led us to become a family. But, then, I remember the Lord trusted us with this precious little one. He knew we had the opportunity and means to give her the best medical treatment available. This is where we just have faith in that fact. That for us not to pursue what is in her best interest, painful or not, would be almost a form of neglect. Ultimately, all we want is what is going to make her life the richest it can be (not monetarily speaking).

Here she is last night playing on the computer...she is very impressive. The girl has some serious computer skills. The doctor instructed to keep her inside so when the big kids went outside, she got spoiled by Daddy...air hockey and computer time with Dad...can life get any sweeter?

Day 2...looking good :)

Well, she woke up and is in a bit of pain. I have given her Motrin. Her neck is "oww-wee" and seems to be really tender and her throat is hurting, probably from the breathing tube. She struggles to swallow. Poor baby. Off to love my little one up - for her that really is the best medicine :)

The End of a Season...

Faith hit her stride in soccer. She has been playing soccer since she was 4, she has played in 3 cities because of our moves and she has experienced a lot of different coaching styles. I would have to say it is her "thing". It is one marker that she describes herself by. If you ask her what she likes, enjoys doing, or has a passion for soccer is most definitely high on her list.

I'd be lying if I told you enjoy all the practices, sitting in rain at games and washing those nasty uniforms or cleaning muddy cleat marks out of the car or carpet. There is a part of me that feels like it just takes up too much time. But, there is also another part of me that knows it is something that brings her joy, that lights her fire, that makes her feel part of a team, that gives her self confidence and that she truly excels at.

I am big reader of Dr. Dobson. I just get him and he helps me to understand what I maybe miss in my own little mind. Here a few things that I have read from him that have helped me to understand and embrace our Faith's love of soccer:

"It is our job as parents to help our children find their strengths and learn to exploit them for all the self-satisfaction they will yield" (She is good at soccer and she loves it)

"The greatest anxiety for an adolescent, far exceeding the fear of death, is the possibility of rejection or humiliation in the eyes of his/her peers" (She is equal on the field, they encourage and accept her)

"Today's generation of kids will go through some incredible pressures, maybe more than any generation in previous days." (On the soccer field, she is just a kid...no peer pressure and no feelings of - Am I pretty enough?...I think she gets to let go of all the Jr. High expectations and just play - playing, now there is a concept for a 13 year old)

Nice throw
Shot on goal!

Look of determination

Her famous body deflection - she does this at least once in every game

Totally won the ball

Yep, she gets this one too
A couple of her cutest fans ;)

Do you see that joy I was talking about? This was after her last game in 90 degree weather and the smile, well, it speaks for itself :0)

Our Little Graduate...

Gosh! Where does time go? Seriously. Hope graduated from Pre-K on this past Thursday. She is officially ready to begin Kindergarten. She just assumed you finish one and begin the other. It is going to be a long summer. She keeps asking, "Now, when is it I start Kindergarten?"

She has accomplished quite a bit this year. She grew 5 inches from the beginning of school until now. She can easily write all her letters and numbers. She started caring about coloring. Before it was the mad dash to finish quickly to get to centers. Now she takes some pride in her ability to choose colors appropriate for objects and remain in the lines. She sings more songs than I know...and with a joyful heart. I love to hear her voice echo through the house. She is quite good. She can carry a tune far better than I can. But, unfortunately, that isn't saying much. She knows more scripture than many adults. She has heard almost all the Bible stories and remembers them and can retell them. Oh, and she has 4 loose teeth...no kidding. In case you haven't noticed, she is quite a big deal around our house.

She has lost most of her baby look to her. She is long and lean and loud....oh is she loud. The poor girl gets told to turn her volume down multiple times a day by me...she is "an angel" in classroom. Thank goodness :)

Receiving her diploma. She kept referring to it as a book report. She was concerned about her "book report". She finally decided to open it up and was disappointed. She said, "Oh Mom, this isn't even a book report...it is just a blank piece of paper."

Our little lady :)

Then she enjoyed some punch to which she said..."Mom, red wasn't a good choice, was it?"

MiMi and Hope after graduation

My sweet little graduate - who is most definitely ready for Kindergarten.

Just so ya know...her momma, on the other hand...she isn't ready.
Why do they have to grow up so fast?